If an alien looked like Helena Christensen then I would enjoy an anal probe

Not only have you been abducted, but lots of
interesting things have happened to you aboard
that spaceship. You've been anally probed
countless times and the creepy part is that you
may have actually enjoyed this. You're insane.
No, really. You're insane. This is a good
thing! Most people respect you as well as fear
you. It doesn't matter what they think,
however; it's only a matter of time before the
aliens beam you up and take you away for good.

Have You Been Abducted By Aliens?
brought to you by